I’m Not Happy

There are people who, no matter what you do, no matter how much effort you exert just to make them happy, don’t know how to appreciate the little things around them. And the problem with me is I find it hard to tell them how I really feel since I have this kind of sickness: pride. I don’t want my ego to be bruised and once I admit it to them, then it’s a white flag that I’m waving.

I’ve been having mood swings lately though my monthly visitor just dropped by a week ago or so. >_< I get upset and sad easily and I don't know why. Even just the smallest things like "What a lame joke" as what my classmate told me made me upset. I'm crazy, obnoxious and an attention-seeker. I have to stop this because I feel like I'm behaving like Tricia of PBB Teen Clash 2010, though I don't tell anyone how I feel. As what I discovered recently, Tricia has this Histrionic personality and she annoys all of her house mates. Not a single soul likes her in the house, but they're trying to help her. It's hard to keep your face straight and not to show that you're unhappy. It's my birthday tomorrow - oh, it's a few minutes from now as I make this post - and I'm supposed to be happy, but I'm not. It's been like this since June 1. June isn't really a month for me.

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One thought on “I’m Not Happy

  1. Nina says:

    hello. i am sorry that you are feeling that way. i think we all go through a “phase.” it’s just one of those. i know how it is too when it comes to keeping your pride up. i feel defeated when i admit to something! or confess how i really feel. but i mean, that’s just how some people are, you know.

    you’ll be alright. don’t keep it to yourself, find someone who you trust and knows that won’t judge you NO MATTER what you tell them. it’ll be tough but you’ll make it easier for yourself if you find someone.

    believe it or not, i cry on my birthdays. i get depressed. i think it’s the thought of aging another year but it’s something i don’t admit (refer to the first paragraph! :)) but maybe it’s just how we like to express ourselves, yeah?

    feel better! – and happy birthday! smile! 🙂